ok..first of all i had a great conversation with aitert..im truthfully sorry for what i did at the past..u r an awesomely nice person n a gd advisor..im really regretting on all the things i said.. n i've come to realised all this mistakes i had done n im ready to correct it..she is right! she is totally right!! i'll try n keep every single thing she said in my mind.. frm now on..there'll be no more depressing posts over some ppl who is not bothered anymore..i've made a promised to be the best out of myself and just enjoy life.. life has gotta be way more than that..i feel so silly over all this..im depressed n was so dull bcoz of them while they r just simply making fun of me having a blast saying stuff i wouldnt wanna noe at all..its time to put an end to all the miserability n depressions..im all over it..i had a long tough time n im tired of it..past is past..its not worth it..hypocrites r outta my life..

again, i really salute and admire aitert..she speaks like a really experienced and educated person..she earns my total respect! n im gonna feel a huge lost when she's moving to aussie nxt yr..keep in touch ya..i still have to come to u for more..winks* thanks for teaching me those things..really treasures it..

im on a mission..start a new joyful and contenting life!! "nothing u saids its gonna bring me down" i have new perspective about life..n im such a dork for actually felt n had the impact of what they said on me!its the worst thing i've ever done to myself.. not gonna along that to happen..im just gonna move along and say whatever as much as they want bcoz i really dont care..just say we have different perspectives..u might laugh at me or u'll just understand it..u might think its silly n dumb while im thinking look at urself b4 u said anything..n i might be thinking the same thing ur thinking about me..so no worries im not gonna jugde anybody anymore..bcoz judging is not fun n pleasant at all.. mayb u havent been through it but what comes around goes around..-did i said it correctly? anyway..u shld get my point..if u know what i mean..

anyway..it feels like a burden is out of my chest..i feel lighter n of coz better..live happily is all i want..im contented..

cheers* happy days everyone!! *huge smiles* im feeling like a bird spreading my winds to fly up in the sky..free and relaxation..or chocolate melting on the taste buds..satisfaction and melting the sorrows..

n i noe y'all love pictures.i'll try n get more pictures ya..brighten the atmosphere around! 1 more gd news..me n him..ok adi..i feel much relief now!

finally im back to blogging..n actually get to go on9..blame the mouse n streamyx! well..i wanna have a recap about yesterday..a sweet sunday it was..other than skipping my dance class..im all gd..so 1st we woke up at an extraordinary time on a sun..8.30 in the morn on a sun..=) n went down to pj to have dimsuns..its been a long time..i love dimsuns..it makes me feel energetic after that to start my day..as soon as we finished..dad had an appointment therefore he dropped us back to prepare..later at lunch hour..he came back n brought me, youngest bro n mum to have a gd look at our future home sweet home..my the other bro couldnt come with us n went for a lil trip to sunway lagoon with his mates..

when we were on the way..while mum convincing dad to call grand ma which he did n then grandma, youngest aunt n everybody else went with us..hehe..im so excited..so we went with that special pass..very strict security guards they have..they have everything..guards, CCTVs, dog-one big one! i feel extremely safe staying there..there are fencing too..lol..no need to worry about car stealing again n everything else!! Don’t get the wrong idea its not like the prison tho..u’ll understand if u see it for urself..looks like a nice, peaceful area..all nicely done..i love the guard hse(entrance)..looks like the one in KLIA..lol.. looks like some expensive, richie rich area all tho its not that expensive..i mean where can u get all this with affordable price?? (hehe, promoting)

omg! I finally saw the hse!! The one!! I have my own bathroom as promised!! Well..so is my bro! I got my own toilet at the age of 15 n he? at 11? Anyway.. im grateful! N 2 hses away-near.. I ve a jogging track..muahaha..its so nice..with pondok n stuff..im gonna go jogging every morn..ive been meaning to do that for a long time n thanks for the opportunity..dad really made a right choice by choosing that place..its time to change.. I mean ive been stuck in usj for quite some time..does 13yrs sound long to u? well..it sure does sounds long to me!! Desperately need to move! Byebye subang jaya! Lol..

I heard mel’s mving there too..who knows she might be my neighbour..oh..n about school..i wanna move but mum kinda disagree bcoz she said kota kemuning’s school sucks..? I mean..my present school sucks too..i’ve made so many enemies in my present school..5 of them in mind so far..3 guys n 2 girls..but other than that its all gd n fine! I’ll definitely miss yk, jb, my couz,sm, min, n everybody nice there..so im still considering actually..im not sure if I can do that-let go of my loveliest frens..i don’t wanna make any mistake..n regret after that..so I have a few months to decide..

But for now I wanna decide what colour to paint my future room n everything else..L-shaped sofa it’s a must! Muahaha..2nd place to sleep..n im begging dad to get me a hifi to place it in my room..i think its kinda imposible tho..too many things to buy so I don’t think the money will go to me n my hifi! Maybe later..a few yrs? Lol..i wanna get nice lightings..i wanna have something vintage in my room..i’ve been bz with interior design mags to pick some ideas..if possible I wanna hired somebody real gd in interior designs so that he/she can make my hse looks so gd to resist bcoz I’ll b stuck in it most of the time since its sort of “pedalaman”? I want it to have a modern look but also with some Korean feel like the Korean bbq in taipan..and practically everything nice n gives a cozy feeling..lovely..

In the meantime, I wanna change things that had been in my closet..more funky cool outfits? Bags?? Told ya.. I wanna change everything!! We r all gonna hav3 a new life soon..muahahaaaaaaaaaaa~~n of coz I want a personal com!! My bros will be sharing my old, now com while im a using a new one!! Sweet~

One more gd news to come!! Im finally taking off my braces!! Nxt month is what the dentist told me!! Hope there will be no additional month! This hideous thing had caused so many OUCH-SERS! Right now im having 3!! Can hardly bite!

=) im having gd news for now to myself..lol..hope this is the start of something real gd bcoz im so fed up with my present lifestyle n stuf like that..its time to put an end to all this miserability..i've did my part n tried my best..so its up to u..say what u want?! but nothing u say its gonna bring me down!(shut up-song) lol..a very gd news to myself(afetr all this blog is mine) i'm finally moving!! yay! triple yays! figured its time to upgrade my lifestyle since its abysmally tragic.. make a change is gd rite..new environment..new hse..new ppl..its all i ever wanted right now.. god is fair! he makes me feel depressed n miserable 1st b4 giving me something really sweet..=) thank god! ;) new room here i come..

hope my neighbours r some hunky hottie dudes..=) they make my days!! lol..laughing can help in burning fats..? cavin just told me so i practically "forced" him to slim-kan me..i love laughing..lol..lol..lol..lol..LOL.LOL..

i seriously cant wait for end of this yr..im so excited!! if possible i wanna change my everything..i mean it!! every single thing! bcoz im not happy with everything i've.. well if 2006 cant be my yr then 2007 can be it..i'll totally be flattered since there's not much of 2006 left!! MUAHAHAHA..

get rid of all this scums and all this those memories.. i'll definately leave all this bhind! lalalalala..i wanna sing my lungs out..but.......still got a few more months to suffer..so i'll shall be patient..yoga n meditation can give a lil hand..i just wanna live n be able to actually breath..

muax..happy b'day mum!! <3 u..n thanks for everything..i mean the goods..=) secretly bought her a cake..its frm secret recipe again..since she loves the mango delight so much..but unfortunately there aint any..there are not allowed to sell it? i wonder y..mangos is m'sias all gone rotten? anyhow..bought her the chocolate indulgence instead..-turnd out to be my favourite! LOL!!

nerve-racking..tada..

well..i guess everybody hates me now? mainly for the best thing ive ever had..my blog..ppl get mad n starts spilling everything out..is that wrong? why must they make such a big fuss over a small thing which is practically nothing..since when they cared so much about my stuff n what i was about to said n say..seriously..whats ur problem? so now r u trying to tell me im all wrong n trying to take the best thing out of me..!

this is not it....now ppl will be thinking n talking stuff about me! U DO NOT KNOW ME! SO STOP JUDGING ME! U HAVE NO RIGHTS TO JUGDE ME BCOZ U DONT EVEN NOE ME!bsides do u think u r qualified to judge me..only god can do that..-am i making myself clear? so stop saying things about me would u..its ok to keep it to urself..dun worry u can have a blog n spill everything out.. it feels gd..n no worries..i'll never visit it.bcoz i totally couldnt careless..n have no intention to find out about u n ur stuff at all..

the most frustrating part is..im very very disappointed in a particular someone..i thought he is diff frm others..i thought he is different and unique in his own way! i seriously do..but now that i know..he had completely changed my mind n my gd perspectives about him! i serious thought he might be able to understand me-the only one perhaps? i dont care what others think about me..! but him..i care! alot too! i dunno y..but as far as life is concern..i seriously do care about what he thinks about me..-in case ppl get the wrong idea..its not THE HIM! its the other him! a him that i once loved? n i thought he was the best gentleman ever ive met in my whole damn life! thinking about what he might say n think about me makes me feel totally miserable and sick..i suddenly felt tears rolling down my cheeks! this is close to the end of the world..

i really hope he understands..or maybe he is just influenced by his fellow frens..i dunno..thats not like him tho..not the him that i thought i know..now all that im asking for is peace..laugh at the back of me..stab me at my back..just dont lemme noe..it feels terrible..im trying to take over the hatred i have in myself..so..its very nice of u to help out by stopping it all..dont worry i'll never blog about u ppl again..as i was saying..im not perfect..im 15..i made mistakes..i noe its really not really nice of me to say those things n mentioned about u ppl..i tremendously sorry..-this time i really mean it..so i hope YOU-s can get over it n move along? i dont hate u..i just dislike u..ok..i cant deny it..but i'll do whtever it takes to clear it off..living in a hatred feel is no gd..im not born to hate..love to live, live to love-motive of life frm this point onwards! just get over n dont find a thing with me..n it'll be all ok..

its really late right now for me..i usually sleep at the most late also 11.30pm or so..but today is..i dont think i'll be getting my gd nite sleep today..im still busy helping dad with his quotation..last min again! n in the meantime i thought i'll just brief a short one about my recent stuff that had been going on..

firstly im so gonna flunk my trials!! just hope this doesnt occur in my PMR! i am determine to study after this..not last min like now..slow n steady n understand every single word n memorise it frm the bottom of my soul.. all though there have been some stuff that had been occuring in my mind and crossed my mind..but i shall never neglect my studies!

bsides my trials..PMr! i guess im pretty fine..im still trying to get used to my new pair of contacts..n as usual..im enjoying my time in teacher's ane class..she is so right!! if only everybody has the same opinion like her..life would be way better than expected!

n kong minhui is freaking me out with her lill stories.. thank god im not sleepin alone in my room right now..she made me recalled the worst nightmare i once had..ok..better stop there..my goosebumps r rising..

i gave up..its over..he is outta my mind..well..its easy to say but..i have determination as the recipe..so lets just hope he will soon be forgotten! bad memories.. at least its easier than i thought..it took me a real long time to forget about the other him! im very used to not having anything i hope for or whatsoever come true..-never had a dream come true...

im starving! kit kat on hand! love it!
practically thats about it..im out..

oh i realised how boring n dull my blog is..compared to others..but..who cares..fake a smile*

is voicing out my own lil opinion in my own lil blog a sin? thanks for visitin..to those that visited invisibly..guess u noe who u r..n do tag..totally welcome! dare to visit darent to show ur wonderful presence? thats so not u-the u that i noe!
well..i guess i better apologise before i got sue frm some1! sorry!! extremely sorry for writing down in black n white! so i shld learn frm u guys by just saying it n not dropping it down then ;P

im not gonna allow anybody unwanted to ruin my life! so back off! i'll definately appreaciate that!

have a wonderful day, ppl! cheers!

hmm..its nice to get a passerby? yeah..i noe i might offend sum1..but bare in mind that they offended me 1st..so y must i consider their feelings when they dont even care about me at all..im just returning whats right in my opinion..well..i guess they couldnt careless also so i just do what makes me feel gd..spil it all out without bothering the consequences..its tough to keep everything to one self..sooner or later it'll explode n die! i dont wanna die in such way.. anyhow..thanks for visiting..whoever u r..-who knows i might offended u b4..just dont messed with me n bring peace..=) i still cant find a person who actually knows the real me..

bsides that, my day today was..ok..pros n cons..cavin seriously made me laugh like anything else..im so glad he was bhind there or i shall be bored to death or stay depress n moody the whole time..thanks for "saving me"! im really glad to have a fren that can talk and joke like nothing else..i love laughing!! =) and there goes the girl again..shld really look at the way she flirted..did she just had a short term memory that she couldnt rmb she is currently in a relationship..well..same to goes to the bf too actually..seriously meant to be together.."we belong together"-sing that to each other..totally suitable..

on top of that, i was having my trials..n i dont feel anything..weirdly..maybe im just too used to ujian bcoz i was having the "latih tubi" the whole time..so how can i not get used to it..hmm..im gonna get my contact lens..ive been meaning to change my appearance and lifestyle..not too mention some ppl too..dont wanna have anything to do with them anymore..im still lack of 1 person to start a new class for my bm..still hunting for that saviour right now..anybody who needs a bm tuition?? pls contact me A.S.A.P..thank u..may buddha bless u..=)

S.O.S=short of sleep..zzZZZ..so tired le..hope everything will go smoothly as in my trials n later my pmr!! hm..i shall start mugging again.. gambateh! lets all work hard together! n break free! i sense..positive thinking and happy life!! smiles*

say byebye to depress for now!

pain is what im afraid of..